Imagine, if you will, the Christmas period of 1998. Then imagine a house in the north-west of England. Then an overly sensitive nine-year-old boy with a head of ginger hair and a life of cultural flânerie before him. If your imaginationoscope isn't functioning properly, please regard those opening three sentences as scene-setting for the forthcoming... Continue Reading →

The world's finally started paying attention to the obscure theories I keep locked up in my silent mind. Well I say "theories", plural, but specifically all I'm noticing right now is one theory, singular. In case you hadn't noticed (or in case you're not currently in the UK which, this being the Internet, you're probably... Continue Reading →

Once again, I've plundered the hypothetical depths of the overdraft. This adventure into nothingness comes courtesy of the humble property-owning agency from whom I sought shelter in exchange for money I'll be paying back for the rest of my life and possibly an extra seven years after my own personal oblivion.The situation plays out thus:... Continue Reading →

Because life gets so boring on occasion, I end up resorting to daydreaming for a considerable portion of time. It's the only time my brain gets to cut loose and run riot and other mildly anarchic sounding phrases as well. Sometimes, the brain strays too far from the boundaries (even though there are no boundaries,... Continue Reading →

Whatever happened to time? When you're a child time seems infinite, school drags on forever, Friday night feels miles away from Monday morning. As you get older, you wake up, make breakfast, eat it, watch TV and suddenly it's night. And I'm not just saying that from a TV addict's perspective. Whilst, yes, I do... Continue Reading →

According to the common Gregorian calendar, today is the last one before the calendar runs out and has to start all over again for the 2,012th time since people started counting (except if you're in Samoa). It is because of this momentous fact, that there's nowhere else left to go after December except to go... Continue Reading →

In the midst of hand-scrawled sheets of lined A4, books big enough to squash rats, clothes that haven't been hung up again days after being discarded onto the futon, half a packet of malted milks, an empty mug, a plate with nay but a splattering of disused tomato ketchup left upon it and the cold... Continue Reading →

According to Horoscopes, it's currently the lunar high. Basically what that means is that the moon is presently in a position in its orbit that, from an Earthly viewpoint, makes it correspond with other stars in the sky in such a way that it casts positive feelings upon the peoples of this planet, and it... Continue Reading →

I've arrived here with a brain all of a mess, with nothing in particular to focus on, with a cup of tea I somehow forgot to put the teaspoon-and-a-half of sugar in but have been drinking it anyway because I simply can't be bothered going back to the kitchen.I'm cold, so much so that I'm... Continue Reading →

 So here it is, as an 89th episode spectacular (and mostly because I can't be bothered tocome up with anything new today but want to stick to my once-a-week, doing-one-of-these-every-Wednesday kinda thing), my first (and so far only) published bit of rambling. Huzzah and joy and such. You can see the original broadcast of this... Continue Reading →